Being newly engaged in 2020 is a lot of feelings. The love of your life – your soulmate – has asked you to begin a joint life together as partners and you’re overwhelmed with joy. But then you’re still overwhelmed with fear (COVID-19), anger (BlackLivesMatter), anxiety (November election), sadness (wildfires) and overall disappointment (still recovering from many canceled getaways and an Elton John concert).
The day Dave proposed, I was emotional. The night before, we learned that the Notorious RBG had sadly passed. Many couldn’t even grieve the loss, because we had to fight for what happens next to our country. The morning of the proposal – which I had no idea was to happen! – I was crying for the millions of American lives, especially women, LGBTQIA+, BIPOC, impoverished people, that will be directly impacted by who our representatives select to replace RBG. As a woman, I fear that my right to choose what happens to MY body, is a right that may be taken away from me. As a human, I fear what decisions may be made to health coverage. As an American, I’m angry that We The People are not selecting the next Supreme Court Justice and again, we see OUR representatives not representing US whatsoever.
I had a lot on my mind as we were walking in Central Park and Dave got down on one knee, and then everything changed for a lovely instant and the world was as it should be – a safe place for us to love and be loved. I love him for completely surprising me and asking me to marry him. I still can't believe that I'm engaged. You spend years looking for someone to love and for that person to love you back with respect, compassion, loyalty and humor. It truly is a moment and a celebration to have found your partner in this crazy world. I'm forever grateful to the universe that I met Dave at the club on a Halloween night out almost four years ago.
Everyone tells us to enjoy this moment, yet everyone is already asking me when the wedding will be and it’s hard to even imagine what a wedding will look like in our pandemic world – or even early “post-pandemic” world. I also wonder “why doesn’t anyone ask Dave these wedding questions?” These questions fall on women if you’re marrying a man, and it’s annoying! With everything going on in our country (see above), plus work and life, the thought of planning a wedding is daunting for me.
However, 2020 has taught me to enjoy life when it’s good, when you feel loved, supported, appreciated, celebrated and excited. 2020 has been a reminder that you can’t plan life or a wedding, you must be prepared to pivot and maybe that’s what makes life magical. The moments you don’t plan for can be the most beautiful, like our engagement!
Thank you to our family members, friends, coworkers and neighbors for the well wishes! It means the world to us and your words are part of my happiness today. I can’t wait to continue celebrating with you all. If anyone has any pandemic wedding planning advice (a request I never thought I would have!), please reach out. I’m currently in love, yet stressed lol.